Frêsh Fish

Friday, June 13, 2008


Neanderthal vs. Newman

If democracy is so great, how come all recent candidates for President have been so banal? I could tolerate a process were on rare occasion a faux pas occurred and We The People were offered a less than ideal candidate for the top office in the land, but rather than being the exception, the democratic process in the United States has continually selected Presidential candidates that are an embarrassment. The democratic process is like forcing one to choose between a pig and a cow for the Beauty Contest Winner.

There is a reason though that the democratic process continually selects suboptimal candidates for President. The basic fundamental of democracy insures mediocrity. The basic fundamental of democracy is one man – one vote, the bell shaped curve. The basic fundamental of democracy dictates that a large portion of the more degenerate members of a society are needed to select a President.

The current 2008 Presidential Election certainly supports the tenet that the democratic process continually selects candidates that are far from ideal. It is hard to believe, nay impossible, that of the over 300,000,000 people in the United States, that John McCain and Barack Obama are the best individuals we could find to run the country. John McCain conjures Neanderthal and Barack Obama reminds me of Alfred E. Newman. The democratic process in 2008 is like, I know my sister is ugly but for $100 I was hoping that you would take her to the prom.

It is embarrassing to be an American. We are spending $340,000,000 a day to support the process of mediocrity in Iraq. We have lost control of our language and our borders. The dollar is the joke of the international financial community. We have no unified energy policy and thus we must kowtow to goat farmers who wear do-rags and don’t use paper to wipe their ass. And we are being forced to choose between a Neanderthal and Alfred E. Newman.

Neanderthal vs. Newman.

Americans have been harangued since day one that democracy is the best form of government. The democratic myth is repeating over and over again until the mantra becomes a 1+1 = 2. Why? Because.

If democracy is so great, how come all recent candidates for President have been so banal?

During the Presidential selection process hundreds of millions of dollars are spent and millions and millions of man hours are also devoted to picking the “best” leader. We spend an inordinate amount of scarce resources, time and energy, on selecting a President, and every time we end up with someone who resembles Howdy Doody.

Consider an alternative method. On election day put the name of every registered voter of legal age to become President in a drum and let the Gods decide. It would almost be as good as American Idol. I suspect a President selected by random draw would be no worse than what we get via the drawn out processing of primaries and voting. The shocker is that by using the random draw method of selecting a President, there is actually a larger, albeit small, probability, that the person selecting to be our leader would be more effective than the current democratic process that insures that a mediocre person will become our leader.

Our current state of affairs in the United States is depressing but don’t despair, there is still hope. Recently I came across an independent candidate for President in 2008. His message is both simple and sublime –


You can vote for mediocrity, or Neanderthal, or banal, or vacuous, or whatever, but I am voting for The Good Candidate. I am voting for Bob.

Don't make a bad choice, vote for The Good Candidate.

Vote For The Good Candidate

© 2008 big box industries